Top Search Gainers Are Idol-licious

1. Martin Luther King, Jr. Day - The search community really rallied around this cultural hero and icon by staging a Google bomb to take a white supremacist-run spoof site down a few notches in the search rankings. The site, which at first glance appears to be legitimately honoring King, ranked number one in Google's index. A week's worth of supporters linking to King's Wikipedia entry and Nobel Prize biography page, knocked down Stormfront's link to the sixth position.

2. Golden Globes - Before "Dream Girls" got the finger from the Academy this week (first time in history a film receives most nominations but not one for best picture), the red carpet was tramped by tramps and the latest nearly tragic broken heels. The wedding reception-style set up was a hoot, though. I kept waiting for the best man to come out and slur his speech.

3. Tony Curtis - The 81-year-old "Some Like It Hot" star fell ill just after Christmas and was hooked to a respirator.

4. American Idol - Though it looked like the short bus dropped off this year's glamour-hopefuls, the new Star Search brought still attracted 37 million viewers. The software engineer that looked exactly like a grouper and sang like wounded Tasmanian Devil was my personal favorite.

5. Shawn Hornbeck - The nation has been captivated by the bizarre kidnapping, rescue, and subsequent media parade of two boys. Hornbeck, the 15-year-old victim spent four years in captivity.

6. Paula Abdul - If you thought the show was over at 10 PM Wednesday, you were so wrong. Though Paula insists she's never been drunk in her life, a TV-news interview had people wondering about her seeming inability to enunciate. . .or face the camera. . .or make sense. . .or act one bit sober. Sssometimez sheee awlwayss likes tooo suh-lur at innerviewz. Or maybe she's just gone bat-crap crazy. Which is better? Rehab or the nuthouse?

7. Australian Open - It's summer Down Under, which is good for tennis. In the winter, which is upside down summer, the courts are Australian Closed.

8. Water intoxication - A radio contest turned tragic, simultaneously educating the public that you can, actually, die from drinking too much water.

9. 24 - The following description takes place between now and the time I finish. Jack Bauer's four-hour blitz on prime time ended in a California nuke. Luckily, the frost-bitten citrus crops were saved.

10. Tricia Helfer - I'm not much of science fiction fan, but I could be if Playboy keeps doing spreads of the blond starlets on these shows. Battlestar Gallactica just got a lot more interesting thanks to a nod from the Hef.